The Triffid

I have a triffid in the corner of my smallish garden. At least I call it a triffid, as it is huge, fast-growing, and pretty difficult to keep under control. I have no idea what plant it actually is, as I have never seen one before, and have been unable to identify it, which is unusual as I am an avid gardener and usually either know or can discover the genus of any plant. But this one has me stumped – I’ve never seen anything like it before. I inherited it from the previous occupants of the house I live in – it was here when I arrived. Luckily it had been put into a corner, where it can do the least damage to other plants. It’s not a suitable plant for a small garden, given its rampant growth habit, but there we are – it’s here, and I have to live with it.

My triffid is very prickly – it is the most horrendously prickly plant I have ever come across – thick gloves are essential when dealing with it. It is also very fast growing – it seems to grow about a foot a week, or more, in the summer months. It has long woody stems which have a white bloom and loads of those lethal thorns, and yellowy-green leaves which congregate high up the stems and create an overarching umbrella-like habit, cocooning that corner of the garden in dense shade. During the spring and summer months of the growing season it shoots up fast and gradually forms the umbrella of foliage. As the stems get longer and longer, the umbrella effect gets higher and thicker, until it is towering over everything else in that part of the garden and creeping over the roof and into the gutters of the adjoining building (not mine). Luckily the other plants living in that bed are able to tolerate shade, which is just as well, as for a few months they are completely submerged by the triffid!

Now at some point during the summer, the triffid gets so big, and has so much overarching foliage, that the stems are no longer able to hold it all up, and it falls over! It’s a bit too boisterous for its own good. I’ve been in this house for three summers now, and this has happened each year. Then it has to be either hoisted up and tied back in place against the wall (very tricky job due to the prickles, and almost impossible singlehanded), or clipped back and given a very severe haircut in order to get it back upright and into position supporting itself again. Today I spent most of the day in the garden, engaged in the latter activity of severe clipping, and completely filled the council’s big green waste bin with all the clippings – that will give you some idea of the enormity of the triffid - it’s huge. Now it’s upright and back in place, albeit somewhat shrunken to less than half its previous size, and the plants underneath can at last breathe again. Phew!

Despite the prickles, and the fact that I have no idea what this plant is, and its habit of overgrowing to such an extent that it can no longer support itself, I have a sneaking admiration for the triffid, which is why I have allowed it to remain in my garden. It’s so intensely alive and eager to grow, and just goes for it, whatever the consequences – in this case, the inevitable crash to the ground sooner or later! I think we can learn a thing or two from this; when life takes us in a certain direction, or brings something into our lives that we intuitively know is right, that, in my view, is the time to go for it without reservation, passionately, not considering the possible outcome, like the triffid. In doing so we just trust that all will be well and that Life will take care of us, as it always does. OK, we might fall over or get a severe pruning, but we pick ourselves up again and carry on! Nature doesn’t think – “well, if I grow too big, I may break my stems or fall over” – it just does what it needs to do, come what may. May we have the courage to recognise all life’s opportunities and go for them, as the triffid does.

Sheila Whittaker 17.7.16